Inclusive Weddings: Planning Tips for LGBTQ+ Couples

The wedding industry has made great strides toward inclusivity, but lingering concerns about how vendors will treat you – and whether they’ll respect your love story – are still valid.

We spoke with Kirsten Palladino, co-founder of Equally Wed and Equally Wed Pro, to get expert advice about selecting your LGBTQ+ wedding dream team with confidence. From spotting red flags to celebrating your authentic selves, here are her tips for finding social event professionals who can help you create a celebration full of love, respect, and care.

Who Can You Trust?

Kirsten shared that LGBTQ+ couples tend to fall into two camps when it comes to selecting wedding professionals: Either couples aren’t worried at all about how they’ll be treated or they’re very worried based on previous negative experiences with discrimination in professional services.

“The number one thing we hear from Equally Wed readers is, ‘We don’t know who we can trust,’” Kirsten says. “Wedding planning is such a heart-centered process, and couples don’t want their feelings trampled on during such a happy time.”

To help LGBTQ+ couples feel more confident, Kirsten suggests identifying “green flags,” “beige flags,” and “red flags” when researching potential partners to pull off your wedding.

Green Flags: These are signs that a business is actively inclusive and affirming:

• They use LGBTQ+ inclusive language like "marriers" or “couples” on their website and marketing materials.
• Their social media or portfolio features LGBTQ+ couples.
• They use symbols of inclusivity, like the rainbow flag or Pride statements, on their platforms.

Beige Flags: These businesses could be an ideal match, but you’ll have to do more research.

• They use inclusive language, but their portfolio lacks visible LGBTQ+ representation.
• They might not have had the opportunity to work with LGBTQ+ couples yet. They could be both open and prepared to do so.
• If you’re interested in their work, ask them directly, “Have you done LGBTQ+ weddings before?” or “We’re an LGBTQ+ couple. Would you be excited about and comfortable working with us?”

Red Flags: These are signs that this business may not be a good fit:

• Their portfolio and marketing materials feature only heterosexual couples (and often only traditional “bride and groom” imagery).
• Their language and branding feel exclusionary or prioritize only cisgender heterosexual weddings.

Communicate Your Needs

As Kirsten explains, inclusivity isn’t just about how wedding professionals market themselves, it’s also reflected in how they treat you and respond to your wedding vision.

“The best thing LGBTQ+ couples can do is embrace who they are and not let others define their love—or what their wedding should look like,” she says. 

Whether it’s asking to be addressed by your pronouns, choosing unique titles for wedding roles, wearing a suit instead of a dress, walking down the aisle with your best friend or partner, or incorporating chosen family into your ceremony, personalization is what makes your wedding truly yours.

Remember, it’s your wedding day—there are no rules! Well, not quite, Kirsten notes. You still have to send thank-you notes.

Emerging Trends in LGBTQ+ Weddings

LGBTQ+ couples continue to make personalization a cornerstone of modern weddings. Kirsten noted a few trends:

Incorporating Chosen Family: For many LGBTQ+ couples, chosen family plays a central role in their day. This could mean giving people of honor prominent roles, such as sitting in the front row or performing readings during the ceremony.

Charitable Giving: Couples are using their weddings as opportunities to raise funds for causes like trans rights, marriage equality, or other LGBTQ+ initiatives. This could be in lieu of favors or through donation links at the reception.

Authenticity Above All: LGBTQ+ couples are redefining what weddings look like by creating new rituals that reflect their love story. This includes the reinvention of the flower girl role or having all-gender wedding parties.

Putting it Together

By learning to spot green flags, embracing your true selves, and working with vendors who champion inclusivity, you’ll create a wedding that reflects your authentic love story. That’s the ultimate goal.

Finding the right wedding team as an LGBTQ+ couple might take a little extra effort, but the reward is worth it: a team of professionals who will celebrate your love and help you bring your wedding vision to life with respect, care, and joy.

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Want more tips for planning your dream wedding? Follow us on Instagram @AtlantaWeddingExtravaganza for wedding pro highlights and inspiration for all couples and join us at the next Atlanta Wedding Extravaganza!

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